Lessons from a Father: Lesson 1

5 Lessons from a Father

By Hope A. Bevilhymer

  On Tuesday 2/18/2014 would have been my Fathers 59th Birthday. Unfortunately there will be no Birthday Cake, no Birthday Wishes, no Hey Dad I Love You and no Spending Time with you.  He left this earth a couple years back and today I have chosen to remember him.  Remember all the things that he taught me.  I am one of the fortunate individuals that knew without a shadow of a doubt he loved me. As I think of him on this day I think back too the lessons he has taught me. Over the next several weeks I will be posting the 5 Lessons I learned from my Father. I think if my Father was standing in front of me today what he might say to me...

REMEMBER THE 5

LESSON NUMBER 1: REMEMBER THE 5

 This is a lesson he instilled in me during my early teens.  I am a believer in people.  No matter their past, present or future. I believe each individual has their own light about them.  I seek the good in people, with this I give it my all not to give up on people.  This can be both a blessing and a curse.  A blessing because I am that one person you can always count on.  No matter how you have treated me or the choices you have made in your own life, I don't give up on anyone.  It can be a curse as well. Because of my choice to look for the good and light in everyone, no matter what. Sometimes I let people get the better of me and I'd arrive home from a hard day. Here I was watering my face and sniffling. ( I call crying watering my face instead of crying because technically that is what your doing is watering your face.)  My dad witnessed this several times he proceeded to put his hand up and told me to REMEMBER THE 5.  I looked at him puzzled not know what he was meaning so I did what any sensible kid would do and slapped his hand to give him 5 and said "Right on Dad."  He then said no I want you to REMEMBER THE 5.  This is how many people you can count at one time on your hand that loves you unconditionally.  It can be family members, close friends, and whomever you would like to put on this hand.  He then said these are the people who will see your good, bad, ugly, happy, sad and whatever emotion you are having and will love you just the same.  No conditions, just straight up Unconditional LOVE.  These individuals are your foundation.  They are the ones who hold you a float, provide you strength and encouragement daily.  He told me everyone else is the bricks that make up the building.  You can build this building however you choose.  Some bricks are so precious and rare that you guard them with your life. The thing he told me about this building and the other individuals that are in my life.  Is at times others will get the better of you and you will feel sorrow.  He said the nice thing about this building is if you don't like the bricks you can rearrange it until it is what you desire.  He let me know that I didn't need to water my face as long as my foundation was solid.  He said REMEMBER THE 5. 
As I grew up my heart would sometimes feel heavy about how others had treated me.  He would just look at me and raise his hand and give me the 5.  I would return by saying I know stop sobbing it has nothing to do with the 5. Almost every time he did that it would lift the weight of the burden off of me.  This lesson taught me that we do have individuals around us that are our strong foundation. If things are not quite what you expected, then change it up and see what the new look adds to your structure.